Contributing Monkie Sarah Backhouse
Published on February 19, 2008
Move over, Dr Phil. The latest authority to chip in on the Spears crisis is PETA. In a letter to Brit’s parents, Jamie and Lynne Spears, the president of PETA, Ingrid Newkirk, offered her two cents on the former pop star’s rumored schizophrenia and bipolar disorder, citing a possible connection between her diet and her mental health:
“We also have heard that Britney asked for ice cream while she was in the hospital. Numerous reports indicate that in bipolar patients who have hidden dairy sensitivities (a fairly common condition), the disorder can worsen if the patient consumes dairy products,” wrote Newkirk. “In addition, the Royal College of Psychiatrists in the UK studied the relationship between mental disorders and the consumption of meat, dairy, and other animal products and concluded that ‘a higher national dietary intake of … dairy products predicted a worse two-year outcome of schizophrenia.’”
While we appreciate PETA extending their concerns to humans, it seems a little simplistic to pasteurize Britney’s problems down to dairy. I mean, what about the fact that this child star of unstable parentage and unlimited funds had her second marriage to a man with cornrows with whom she bore two sons — all by the age twenty-five? Not to mention that her white-trash upbringing, unsavory friendships with spoilt Hollywood brats and various hangers-on, coupled with addiction to Starbucks and Cheetos and god knows what else has created a Tabloid phenomenon of gargantuan proportions.
Along with the letter, PETA also enclosed a copy of their free “Vegetarian Starter Kit.” Because you know what vegetarians like to eat: ice cream.
Maybe PETA should stick to saving animals.