Contributing Monkie G Living Staff Monkies
Published on May 24, 2008
Paris Hiltons new dream car, the Porsche Cayenne hybrid. I have a big white car! I wish I knew the make and model, but I’ve lost the owner’s manual and the letters on the trunk have peeled off. Although, I’ve narrowed it down, using a unique process of finding people over the age of eighty who still drive. I’m 100% confident it’s some type of Oldsmobile or a 1996 Ford Taurus. That being said, I’m not your typical car guy.
I did have a brief love affair with automobiles as a child. I think all little boys do. I built models, wrecked matchbox cars, worshiped my Lamborghini poster, and hauled my lunch box filled with micro machines everywhere. Little boys’ minds are fueled on fantasies of fast cars, skipping showers and staying up late — a playful life with no strings attached. As a child, I dreamt of cruising in my Porsche, on my holiest birthday, scoring the head cheerleader, and blaring Wu Tang. Instead, sadly, I got my first white car, a Buick Le Sabre. Soon after, I broke up with my fantasy cherry Corvette, was involved in a domestic dispute with my yellow banana Lamborghini poster and had my heart broken by the fast and easy Porsche. From there, my prized matchbox collection ended up as small pieces of metal retired to collect dust in my childhood attic.
But recently, I’ve felt that old boyhood spark. An old forgotten flame has come back into my life and gotten me excited about cars again. I’ll admit to a brief crush on the Toyota Prius, but as I look forward to getting a new car, I’m dreaming of a Porsche hybrid. But it’s not a dream without complications, now that, according to Edmunds.com, “Porsche is designing not one new prototype, but two cars: the Porsche Cayenne sport-utility and the Porsche Panamera sedan.” That’s like a Playmate with a sister.
An old fantasy is reborn. The Porsche Cayenne, my pick, is more efficient, looks killer, and can be independently electric. The sensitive, hippie activist just got a sweet facelift. And buying your self-indulgent mid-life crisis just got cheaper as a long-term investment. In the future, fat, rich, and balding man will sleep easier.
Read more details about this new Porche at Edmonds