Contributing Monkie Aria Alpert
Published on April 4, 2012
Photographer: Aria Alpert
So, this is what happened. I am in Roma right now and, being that I am a foodie, I was taken to a hidden Italian slow food restaurant last night for a 9:30pm dinner. Which meant that we didn’t really eat until 10:30pm, much much later than I normally eat. But I was fine with it. I mean shit. I am in Roma for f-sake!
We started with a salted cod capriccio with black truffles and red onion dressed with lemon and amazing olive oil. Then we went on to have fried zucchini flowers and olives, then we split an order of anchovy, raisin, pine nut homemade tagliatelle pasta and then I ordered an onion flan and he had the rabbit.
Oh yes and washed it all down with a lovely crisp bottle of white wine. Oh and I forgot to mention the traditional Italian aperitivo we started off the evening with, at a bar overlooking the coliseum no less. I forgot what the aperitivio was called but it was a mix of campari, sweet vermouth and sparkling white wine. Bitter and very very strong. Definitely woke my jet-lagged ass right up! Anyway we ate and drank and all was delish and merry. Oh and very salty. A bit too salty but f-it I am in Roma remember.
What is my point at painting the picture of my eating and drinking…well first it’s fun and if you are anything like me I like to have a visual…but my main point is…I went to bed with a full belly and a warm fuzzy wine haze. Which, not only affected my not so sound sleep but I woke up feeling not rested and very salty. Puffy to be exact.
With only 5 ½ hours of sleep I stumbled out of bed and immediately drank some water, then came the green tea, green powder, vitamins, anything and everything to get me out of the way I felt in that moment.
Now, I am not saying that’s bad, to try and balance yourself with supplements that make you feel better, I’m just saying I suddenly became conscious of my behavior and stopped and started to observe myself. My patterns to want to change. To want to control. To feel better. To change may present situation, instead of accepting how I was in that moment. And then it hit me. What if everything was perfect just the way it is. Right now. I mean everything. Not just a few things, I mean the way I feel, look, smell, taste, success, no success, love, no love, good health… yes, I am talking about EVERYTHING.
It’s a simple yet extremely challenging concept to fully be in all the time. Maybe that’s not what it is about anyway. Being in it all the time. The goal is to yes. But the searching and the struggles along the way to being in the present I am now understanding that THAT might just be it. The journey, THIS journey we go through to experience these beautiful bursts of being fully present in the now, is what it’s all about. That’s the lesson. The teaching. The learning. Observing yourself within the moments you’re your own struggle of not being happy with who or what you are and not wanting or needing more. Instead of being at one. Balanced within.
I mean I know it’s been said and written and configured in many many different yet similar ways but for some reason this morning, I got it. The idea of it anyway. Deeply. I felt it penetrating, emanating throughout my body.
What if I was perfect just the way I am right now. Because this really is what it is. Right now. Right now is all I have. Are you with me? Profound, it is, it was, to me anyway…